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Without MeThe sun will always shine
So will the moon and all the stars at night
The birds will still call
Dancing in ballrooms at incredible heights  
In autumn, the leaves will turn
And inevitably fall
Spring flowers will bloom
Even if my life ends too soon
There will be other days
There will be other days
Winter will only mourn for summer rays
And oh, there will be other days  
Without me
All their hateI look across the room
I feel their anger like a wave
Of too-hot air running across my skin
But even with all their hate
Its power almost tangible,
They will never hurt me again.
Dread to DareThere she cowers, in the cold  heart of blackness,
Scratching claws, stupidity, on iron bars,
Despair only driving her to madness;
Her mind in torment, reminding ageless scars.

Pacing back and forth in her confinement,
She laments like an animal, trapped forever;
Tears grace her cheeks with bitterness not refinement;
She plotted her escape but they screamed, No never!

She’s done this to herself resignation no other
She’s signed up for torment, she’s signed up for hell!
Wandering from one restricting corner to another
Ragged, torn, and crawling  filth; they swear, don’t tell.

Her ashen cheeks all sunken and hollow
Three Years AgoThree years ago,
A lie changed my life,
It cut me in half,
Just like a knife.

Three years ago,
My family almost feel,
And it changed me,
Sending me to hell.

Three years ago,
I picked up the blade,
For the very first time,
Making the old me fade.

Three years ago,
I risked everything,
All caused by a lie,
I decided to fling.

That all happened three years ago,
When I made a mistake,
And grabbed that blade,
Using it for all the peace I could take.
.:Distance:.My Heart....
Aches with the pain of regret,
all the wrongs i made,
we were so strong and played our hearts as fools,
thinking we could live in a world that we made,
do you see me when i cry?
Or when i scream your name?
My Mind fills with only fantasies of us that will not stop,
I feel empty inside...all alone,
Could you not see the happiness that was in front of you?
Did you ever doubt it?
Maybe if it was real that you saw it,
it would of never come to this.
Now again our hearts in pain, lonely with no one or thing that can fill the void....
Never looking for love until we crossed each other paths...
Forever intwined, never fee
Healing ScarsHe's here with me,
i can feel him when he's here,
but why when he's gone do i feel so weak?
Empty?
why do i feel like a puppy who got their favorite toy away,
He's the one, i'm sure....
He'll never leave, he's promised me....
and i trust his every word....
but why is it the times can not be the same,
for us.... to live in two different worlds,
this pain in my chest,
it burns....making my heart compressed,
a wound that only stings more as time passes....
even time cannot heal all Scars you have from your past.
without closure they only manifest and dig there roots into the depths of your heart....
But he...he can heal it...
Al
PerfectionPerfection.

She lodges her fingers down her throat.

Clasping onto the wall as she recklessly chokes.

She reinserts her fingers back in forcibly.

Deliriously trying to make her body thinner.

She swoons and slumps to the floor nauseously

As she attempts to regurgitate her dinner.

Her throat aches as she screeches out coarsely,

With her hand covering the image in the mirror.

Her head now rests on the on the rim of the toilet seat.

She wants to eat but she just has not got in her.

She desperately begins to scream out inaudibly.

Her mouth now tastes of something pulpy and bitter.

She examines the red color of the fluid cautiously.

Re
Stenciled Smiles on Paper HeartsI don't like to feel this way
There must be something I can say
Cause I hate just watching you
When I know the pain you're going through

Listen…

You're not alone; I've been where you are
Contemplating where I'll place my next scar
Hiding razor kisses underneath long sleeves
It doesn't make it better; nothing is achieved

Believe me…

All you'll earn are the scars you've got and
The lesson learned is the lesson forgotten
You feel like no one's there, no one cares what you do
Let me put it to you straight: That is never true

I Know…

I was shunned, pushed away many times before
Then I realized it was I who had closed the door
I to
Accidental SuicideI sit in my corner, screw in hand, listening to the sound of my ripping flesh. I should scream and run away, but instead I sit and watch as I do it again, and again, and again. I just watch as the blood flows down my hand and starts to drip on the carpet. I should clean that up now, while it's fresh, but I'm too depressed. Cutting is like a drug, every time I cut I need more, and then more, and then more, until I'm chopping half my arm off just to distract myself from the real pain. Now it feels like my arm is on fire, and I can't stop it. But then again, I'm not sure I want to. The fire feels good, like a phoenix's sleeping on my arm. Yes, I
Not Good EnoughNot good enough for me,
not good enough for you,
maybe all the insults
are simply what's true.

What can I say?
Nothing, I'm done,
so sick and tired
of having to run.

So this is the end,
the last puzzle piece,
the very last straw,
the pain will soon cease.

I won't have to struggle.
There will be no pain,
and everyone's lives
will go on quite the same.

Because I am just me.
The greatest disappointment of all.
So say good-bye,
as I start my free fall.
With YouHold me tight,
Please don't go.
I'm falling apart,
falling down so low.

Like a rag doll I'm tearing,
seams falling apart.
I can't sew them back up,
wouldn't know where to start.

I need your help,
but I'm too scared to say,
too scared to reach out,
tell you to stay.

You're my only hope,
like it or not.
My chances are slim,
but I'll give it a shot.

So hold me up,
don't let me fall,
just tell me it's okay,
answer my call.

That's all you need to do,
and I'll be alright.
With you by my side,
I'll stand up and fight.
A poem about missing her
Wasting time thinking of you,
Is making me wish you knew,
Saying it to you is too hard,
He’s standing on guard,

My sense’s say let her be,
Except there’s still that part of me,

Longing for you to be close,
Ugly, that’s what I tell my self you are,
Careless, that’s what I’ve been so far,
Kissing them is hard to do, cause I think about is you.
no one is ever going to want memaybe once
this would've been
poetic
but i'm crying &
there's nothing
pretty
or wonderful
here

i think
my face is scrunched
like a red rag
in the sink
slumped beneath a leaky
faucet &
my hands are shaking

maybe i could make
it
sound nice--
high
buzzed
lustful
but what i have
you won't like

memories
and do you want them too?
stealing & paying
pressing bottles and
pictures to my sternum
the heat
the cold

maybe it's the silence
that hurts
the stumbling
the tumult of words down
the sink and
across the floor
the empty heads
&

i was pretty then
bird-legs and stilted poems
so nice
numbering stars and
crushing books between
my teet
Freaks ShowFingers scratching at my wrist,
Wanting a beautiful kiss.
The lips they know too well,
Gradually I feel my mind compelling,
Back to almost a month ago,
When I was still apart of the freak show.
Dancing on the stage,
With a pointy blade,
Focused on a luscious vein.
The oh's and ah's of the crowd causes pain,
I finally notice how different I really am.
I finally notice there is nothing I can,
Do to pick up the glass without getting cut.
I finally noticed that all I am is a nut.
I finally noticed that deep down I'm in the freak show for life,
I can no longer hide and fight,
The true me when it's thriving to come out.
In this moment I do doubt,
T
She has those hushed winter lungs"Silence equals Death"

Gash out my confessions,
push me to the edge of misery
so I can screech out the truth
before my voice attacks my essence.

I made my heart weak and left my
eyes stained on my shirt; I've
accumulated verses of agony, but
my vocals cords are tangled
with fear.

You never stop sinking your
resistance into my neck and
now I've grown silent & frozen
because I murdered myself behind
walls of memories.  
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Recycling and clean energy equal an utter stranger.
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Everything you said was so funny, I couldn't stop listening to your amazing voice.
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December 23, 2012
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I'm weaker than you.

:iconbloodymess-vaot:

I'm weaker than you.
You're stronger than me.
So what?

That does not
Give you the right to laugh at me,
To beat me up and spit on me.
Where all I can oppose you with
Are the tears running through my hands,
disappearing in the ground.
But you are doing it nonetheless.

You succeeded.
Not much left of me.
So stop?

No, you don't.
You're enjoying your superiority.
For you it's just a game, a prank.
But you're turning me cold.
All I can do is collecting
those frozen tears of hate
But you continue nonetheless.

You'll never stop.
I can't do anything.
So wrong!

Even so
all your life you laughed at me,
Beat me up and spit on me,
I do not have the right to poison you,
plunging my tears into your flesh,
laughing for the first time and the last.
But I'm doing it nonetheless.
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:icontommyboywood:
~tommyboywood Apr 22, 2013  Professional Writer
bullies imitate their invisible father (John 8:44)
Reply
:iconbloodymess-vaot:
*BloodyMess-VaoT Apr 25, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
I'm not sure what exactly you mean with "invisible father" I guess you mean both the father who "does not care" and the devil?

I read the passage and I still wonder every day anew why people are so prone to manipulation and so resistant against reasoning...

Especially for children I understand that when they only were shown poor ways from their role model they only know how to act poor.
But I can't understand why so many people never seem to think about their way even when they get older.
Reply
:icontommyboywood:
~tommyboywood Apr 25, 2013  Professional Writer
the devil is the biggest bully of all, and sadly many imitate his poor example, wittingly or more often unwittingly
Reply
:iconsaints-fan-12:
~saints-fan-12 Dec 23, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
I've had my share of bullying and it hurts luckily it stopped and the bully and i became friends, the second time it was one of my friends, but she moved.
Reply
:iconbloodymess-vaot:
*BloodyMess-VaoT Dec 24, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
That you became friends is a nice outcome.:)
Reply
:iconsaints-fan-12:
~saints-fan-12 Dec 24, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
Yep
Reply
:iconjellyfrog1:
~Jellyfrog1 Dec 23, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
We should become evil dictators, and punish anybody that bullies someone with death... maybe a bit harsh but bullying is sick
Reply
:iconbloodymess-vaot:
*BloodyMess-VaoT Dec 23, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
That would prolly be a quite entertaining solution, but wouldn't that be big scale bullying?
Reply
:iconjellyfrog1:
~Jellyfrog1 Dec 23, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
It depends on how you look at it... does Karma count as bullying? ;)
Reply
:iconbloodymess-vaot:
*BloodyMess-VaoT Dec 23, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
Yeah Karma wise it would be their own fault, plus if you are an evil dictator all your actions are justified anyways!
Reply
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